What Are You Trying to Prove?

Every time I get sick, it feels like a divine nudge—a moment where God steps in and says, “Slow down. Reevaluate your intentions.” It’s as if illness becomes a mirror, forcing me to confront patterns that make me unwell. Recently, the question that has been pressing on my heart is: *What are you trying to prove?*

I’ve noticed these challenges seem to come in seven-year cycles. Back in 2017, when I became Artistic Director of Young Playwrights’ Theater, I was fresh off the journey of new motherhood. I remember feeling this intense pressure to prove myself—to show that I could balance it all and still thrive in my career. Now, seven years later, I find myself in a different season of life, returning to work as a cancer survivor. Yet, that familiar urge to push harder and do too much is creeping back in.

Am I falling into the same trap? Am I trying to “do it big” for the sake of being innovative, rather than focusing on the simple, meaningful parts of my work? A wise colleague, Tristan, once reminded me, “Be satisfied with the smallest version of the vision.” That advice resonates deeply because, if I’m honest, the pursuit of “big” can be a long, slow road to burnout.

If this is hitting home for you, take a moment to ask yourself:

• What am I really trying to do?

• What are my intentions?

• Am I just doing for doing’s sake?

• And perhaps most importantly, who does this action serve?

Let’s sit with that last question for a moment: *Who does this action serve?* It’s natural to want recognition for our achievements or to chase financial rewards. I love being celebrated. I especially love getting paid. But if my actions only serve me, that’s my cue to go back to the drawing board.

I’ve learned that what we give to others, we receive tenfold. I aim to give joy, inspiration, love, and laughter to the world. And in return, I’ve been blessed with abundance—resources, community, and opportunities that sustain me. It’s a cycle worth nurturing, one that keeps me grounded in wellness and intentionality rather than external validation.

So I’ll leave you with this: Next time you feel yourself striving or pushing too hard, ask yourself these same questions. And be honest. Are you moving with intention, or are you caught in the endless loop of trying to prove your worth?

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Reflect and Share:

What questions do you ask yourself to stay grounded in your intentions?

Share your thoughts in the comments—I’d love to hear how you navigate these moments in your own life.